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2013年2月1日星期五

世风日下人人自保系列一Personal safety series #2

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误解vs事实

Women's Centre for Change WCC表示, 社会对于强奸这个词有很多错误的观念。这些一般都倾向于以尽量减少问题的严重性,为社会提供一个虚假的安全感,鼓励受害者的指责,并原谅了肇事者。现有的这些看法让肇事者逃脱犯罪,同时也阻止受害者报案或寻求帮助。为了消除错误的观念,使受害者可以寻求帮助,他们需要大家尊重和尊严的对待。

以下是Women's Centre for Change WCC以及 AWAM所列出一些当今社会的看法:

1.  误解:只有年轻,漂亮的女人才会被性侵犯。

事实:对于受害者的年龄有从婴儿到老年。强奸犯为了性侵害他人,年龄是很少考虑的因素。因为强奸犯攻击时似乎是选最脆弱的受害者。因此,当一个强奸犯决定去强奸时,机会才是最重要的因素。

2.  误解:穿着暴露或诱惑男性的女性易惹强奸。
 

事实:强奸犯都会选择被认为脆弱的对象,他们不考虑外观和行为放荡的女性,所以强奸跟女孩的穿着和行为方式是没有关系的。儿童,老妇和女人衣着端庄,或是戴头巾的(马来女性)都有可能是被性侵害的对象。

 

3.  误解:强奸是一种无法控制的欲望行为。大多数强奸是自发行为,强奸者无法控制自己的欲望。
 

事实:强奸并不是因为欲望。绝大多数的强奸案都有计划的,都是有预谋的行为,暴力的激情,而不是一个自发的行为。男性都是可以控制自己的性冲动。绝大多数的强奸犯的动机来自于愤怒和控制他人,而不是两情相悦。

 

4.  误解:大多数女性被性侵害的都是陌生人。


事实:警方的统计数据告诉我们,只有一小部分的强奸案都是陌生人干的。据估计,在80%的情况下,女性都知道强奸犯是谁。在这种情况下,强奸者可能是熟人,朋友,甚至家庭成员。一个强奸犯可以是你身边的任何人。

 
 

5.  误解:大多数强奸案发生在黑暗的小胡同,荒芜的地区,和其他危险的地方。
 

事实:据警方统计,69%的强奸案发生在房屋和建筑物。此统计证明女性也可能会在其他的地方被强奸。晚上时,女生应该小心安静的街道或光线暗淡的地方。

 

6.  误解:丈夫是不可能性侵犯他的妻子。
 

事实:无论是已婚或者未婚的女性,如果一个女性在不同意的情况下发生性关系,她就是被性侵犯的。一些国家的法律是可以对付在婚姻中的强奸。这是因为许多妇女都遭受过家庭暴力,也经历过某种形式的性虐待。而在马来西亚,法律是可以对付性伤害妻子的男性。

 

7.  误解:没有一个女人能在她的意愿下被性侵犯的。如果她真的想阻止被强奸,她是可以办得到。
 

事实:大多数强奸案都涉及暴力和武力威胁。许多受害者没办法还手,都是因为恐惧和害怕反击时会导致更大的伤害。由于强奸是一种潜在威胁生命的犯罪,受害者即使要反击还是必须有一个适当的机会。

 

8.  误解: 她没有尖叫或反击,所以那并不是强奸


事实:当女性受到性侵害时会遇到种种的创伤。比如惊吓、不敢反抗。要想到任何的顽强反抗行为都会造成受害者面对暴力的对待,甚至有生命危险的可能性。即使受害者没有尖叫或反击,受害者还是可能被强迫发生性关系。

 

9.  误解:接吻或拥抱,可能会导致强奸

 
事实:接吻或爱抚是不等于同意性行为。你能够在任何时候改变你的想法。你有权利向性爱说“不”,即使你曾经与对方进行过性爱。

 

 

摘自: Women's Centre for Change(WCC) and Awam


Myth vs Reality

Women's Centre for Change (WCC) showed that there are many erroneous perceptions in the community about rape. These generally tend to minimize the gravity of the problem, provide society with a false sense of security, encourage victim-blaming and excuse the perpetrator. These existing perceptions allow perpetrators to get away with the crime and at the same time discourage victims from lodging reports or seeking help. It is necessary to dispel myths so that victims can be treated with respect and dignity when they seek the help they need. The following is a list of some common perceptions which provided by Women's Centre for Change WCCand  AWAM.

1.      Myth: Only young, pretty women are sexually assaulted.
Reality: The age of rape victims range from infancy to old age. Their appearance is seldom a consideration. Rapists choose to attack victims who seem most vulnerable. Opportunity is the most important factor determining when a rapist will rape.

2.      Myth: Girls who wear sexy clothes or flirt with men provoke rape.
Reality: Rape is not related to the way a girl dresses or the way she acts. This is a myth that excuses the rapist’s behavior by blaming the victim. Rapists choose their victims for their vulnerability and accessibility, without regard to physical appearance or behavior. Children, elderly women, and women who dress modestly or fully-clothed from head to toe (wearing head scarves) have been raped.

3.      Myth: Rape is an uncontrollable act of lust. Most rapes are spontaneous acts of passion where the assailant cannot control himself.
Reality: The vast majority of all rapes are planned. Rape is not about lust. Rape is a premeditated act of violence and not a spontaneous act of passion. Men can control their sexual impulses. The vast majority of rapists are motivated by power, anger and control, not sexual gratification.

4.      Myth: Most women are raped by strangers.
Reality: Based on the statistics of police, it shows us that only a small percentage of rapes are committed by strangers. It is estimated that in 80% of the cases, the woman knows the rapist. In those cases, the rapist is an acquaintance, friend, or even family member. A rapist can be anyone.

5.      Myth: Most rapes happen in dark alleys, deserted areas, and other dangerous places.
Reality: According to police statistics, 69% of rapes happened in homes and buildings. It showed that women are also at risk of being raped in other places.Women should be careful at night, on quiet streets, or in poorly lit areas.

 
6.      Myth: It is impossible for a husband to sexually assault his wife.
Reality: Regardless of the marital or social relationship, if a woman does not consent to sexual activity she is being sexually assaulted. Some countries have laws against rape in a marriage. Many women who suffer from domestic violence have experienced some form of sexual abuse within their marriage. In Malaysia, it is against the law for a man to hurt his wife sexually.

7.      Myth: No woman can be raped against her will. A person can prevent rape if she really wanted to.
Reality: Most rapes involve physical force and/or threats of force. Many victims do not fight back due to fear, shock, or the perception that fighting back will lead to greater harm. Because rape is a potentially life-threatening crime, whatever the rape victim does to survive the assault is an appropriate action.

8.      Myth She didn't scream or fight back, so it wasn't rape
Reality: Women face the trauma of rape in many ways. Some freeze, and are too afraid to struggle. The perpetrator may threaten to kill her if she puts up a fight. In other situations women may be coerced into having sex. The bottom line is, if sex is forced without a woman’s consent, rape has occurred, regardless of how the woman re-acts during the crime itself.

9.      Myth : Kissing or hugging can lead to rape
Reality: Consent to kissing or foreplay is NOT consent to sex! You have the right to change your mind at any time. You have the right to say no, even if you’ve had sex with that person before.

 

Source: Women's Centre for Change(WCC) and AWAM


 

 

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